Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Weddings or the idea of them are fascinating. Yeah this may piss a few people off.

I have never had a dream of the "white wedding".  I am going to get married for the second time and hopefully last time in my life.  When people ask if they can come and/or when it is big day, I just tell them my plans, which is that I'm having a civil ceremony and immediate family will be there if they can make it.  The room has a max of 10-15 people. We are not fancy and didn't want to spend more than 500.00 on wedding related stuff.  That includes our marriage license and we plan to wear simple wedding bands.   No huge wedding, no ceremony, no reception, no bling and mainly, no frills.  The Mister and I just want to make it official after being a couple for almost four years and knowing each other nearly twenty years.  The Mister thought it was overdue and felt it was time for me to have his last name.   We are already married in spirit, so why not get the piece of paper and move on with our lives.

As I continue to repeat myself when people ask me about a wedding or wedding plans, people seem disappointed that there will not be a wedding.  I cannot apologize for that.  Getting married is a personal thing for me and I have had cut ties with a lot of people who have not been sincere in my life.  There are friends who are like family to me and I appreciate them.  And there are blood relatives of mine and the Mister's that have not been as supportive as they could be.  So why should we have a wedding?  To feed people who are secretly hoping we split up, who are closet racists or who just want a social event to attend?  Really?  Not on our watch and pocketbook.

Many events in the past are water under the bridge for us and some, well the damage has been done.  I have pissed off and offended people in the Mister's life apparently.  People have said and done hateful things.  I cannot apologize for being black, being honest and just being myself.  We were not put here to be abused or used by anyone that has been in our lives.   I am not waiting for or expecting any apologies, but they are in order if they want things to go back to the way they were. (At least a little bit.) Anyone that knows me understands that I do not run from confrontation and I don't freak out when people disagree.  Our individual truth differs and everyone has their own lessons to learn.  I am humble enough to understand that and not take things so personally.  I am just over people's petty issues and not being able to apologize when they deeply hurt someone.   Look people, life is never all about you.  Every decision you make will impact another's life whether it be directly, or indirectly.  We are free to do what we choose, but sometimes, you will kill a relationship that can be very beneficial.   If you choose to have people in your life, that is your choice, but remember, if those folks hurt a family member it will have an impact.  In addition, it can break trust when lies and petty jealousies are involved.   People have a tendency to insist they are right and try to prove a point by not resolving a bullshit issue.  They reject and hate for no reason.  Or they don't understand someone so they make their judgement and start drawing lines. More Petty BS probably rooted in their own personal misery and apathy.  This takes way too much energy and you are only hurting yourself in the long run.  In other words,  it's your problem.   By the way, ignoring an issue doesn't make it go away.  Confronting stuff can be a step to work through it.  In other words, to keep your house clean and free of dirt and dust, you need to sweep, mop and vacuum. Dirt and dust doesn't go away on its own.  Or else, you will have a HOARDERS looking house.  We like a clean house in this neighborhood, some people don't get that concept.

With all this being said, we are not having a wedding for many reasons.

  • Cost.
  •  Fake and petty drama from folks that just want something to talk about secretly hoping that the Mr. ends up back at his parents or in the street because they are pissed off someone has his back.
  • We have been connected for years, and married in our mind we just want to make it official. This is going to offend people,  but it's true.  Can't apologize for that.  True love doesn't see color,  or religion my friends. When we both realized that we were soulmates we were involved and/or  married to other people.  We didn't think it would happen, so we forgot about it.  We were both  miserable in our other relationships were tried to have with other people and made the excuse that  were were just friends. Finally, in 2009 we were both single at the same time and decided to give it a shot.  This bothered some people who felt we were both better off with our exes because it made them more comfortable.  Some people just hate change I guess. 
  • Time
  • We are not trying to show off.   We love each other and are best friends, so why not?

It is also not personal if people are not invited to the local City Hall.  There is not enough space and do not try to make me feel guilty, we are doing this for us, not for anyone else.  I have a handpicked witness who I love and trust.  This witness, along with my brother will bounce any crazy cross-eyed ex that may decide to crash!  We may have a party later.  Ideally, it would be nice to have a party immediately, but we have folks that don't know how to act at my house and some who just don't like the arrangement period.  Why fake it with me and come over then? I am not going to have folks in my house that don't care for me and the Mister . What is the point?  I tend to focus on those who love us and who are positive.  And mainly, loyal.  Loyalty has become big with us and some people have proven that they are not.  A few people have been and we appreciate it.

Also, even if money were not a factor and everyone supported our union we wouldn't want a wedding anyway.  We are not registered anywhere, because we have all the household gadgets we need.  Some people get married for the party and the attention.  We just want to get married, because we love each other as cliche as it sounds.

Monday, August 19, 2013

More Toy Runs. Lego vs. KREO. We think they are one in the same

Well this weekend was full of Toy Scores.  Kreo and Lego had many markdowns at Walmart and all of the close out stores!  Thanks to my mother-in-law, we scored an updated Millennium Falcon
and a Friends Set!  We got a good deal on it because she picked it up on clearance for us....

I am collecting extra friends set for all of the purple bricks.  

They are Lego sets with bricks and Mini Figs that we have in our collection, but it's all good. Are going to complain?  Heck no.  Of course we found extra Kreo Sets and GI Joe kreons and Battleship sets.  They are interchangeable with Lego so what is the big difference?

Yes, Walmart has marked down Lord of the Rings sets people!  And they are awesome! 

Austin and I visited every Toys R Us we could to find Wave 1 and Wave 2 of the Joe Kreons.  We found em at the Burbank Toys R Us.  Wave 1, that is......Austin found the second round earlier in the week.  There Kreons are going like hotcakes.  

Here is my complaint!  Scarlet here is ultra cool, but something is missing. 

Her Ponytail.  Now, why does Hasbro have to give this poor woman Kreon man hair?  She has long hair and they gave her a butch hair cut!  The picture is fuzzy, because I refuse to get a smart phone, but I am also mad that they couldn't get it right.  We are just going to get some Lego Red ponytail girl hair and switch it.  

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Checking in.....

Well it's been one of those months already!  August always seems like one of the busiest months of the year for me.  I have birthdays to remember all month which means that not only I'm a busier than usual, I am spending more money and shopping more.  My brother and fiance share the same birthday and they couldn't be so different.  Luckily, they are both easy to shop for.  My youngest brother and a slew of girlfriends are born after the 23rd of of August.  Family has been in town and I have gotten a chance to see their beautiful faces.  I wish they were local and I got a chance to see them more.

I am missing my craft time and knitting.  I will soon return to that in early September. I really want to work on some Bot Con 2014 costumes.  I think I need to go as a female Megatron.  I can totally relate to him lately.  I have picked up a few items to spice up my Jem and Shana costume. I found the perfect purple Shana dress!  It's too bad I cannot go to Jem Con this year. I just need to find a wig large enough to accommodate my huge head full of afro tresses for Shana's hair.   (Yes, summer brings wild hair growth in my world.  Not to mention brittle strands.)  My natural hair journey has been an adjustment. (But that's another blog).

I am behind on my letter writing again.  My cats miss me when I am gone too long and are starting to act out by doing cat aerobics at night. I know that sounds pathetic, but it's true!  I need to work out more.  I need to juice everyday and drink more water.  We need to catch up on our Ray Donovan episodes.  ( I have made time for Devious Maids though.  Susan Lucci is my girl! ).  I stopped taping Hollywood exes.  Those women are getting on my nerves for the exception of Andrea Kelly and Mayte Garcia.

Our house is a disaster.  I only have time to do laundry and clean the bathroom and Austin only has time to do the dishes. So much that I have gotten really grouchy and the Mr. decided it would be a good idea to designate one work night a week to clean house!  Hallelujah!  If he is willing to help more with that and it means doing more than his regular chore like dishes and dusting, then great! I am not going to complain or argue about that.

Our Lego/Kreo custom business is keeping us busy too!  The staff at Toys R Us in our neighborhood is probably tired of looking at us and are trying to figure out why two grown 40ish adults are fighting with the kids over Kreo and Lego sets.

Tomorrow is only the 15th........The month is not over yet......

Monday, August 5, 2013

Earrings and Toy Runs and hanging out with the fam....

It's been a busy couple of weeks!  It's seems like all the family members that I want to be bothered with are in town at the same time and this is rare.....

Shay and I went to a open mic night! Good times and lots of laughs...

The kid brother is in town and we have been hanging out.  Here I am with him and his beautiful lady at the Angel game.....

(left to right, me, Jared (kid brother) and his lady Innesa) 

I was upset that the Angels lost by a point, but oh well.  At least A-Rod is suspended and I know it's cruel that I am gloating, but I can't help it. 

I made a recent trip to a Marshall's near my brother's mom's house and this kid had the nerve to try to fight me for these toys.

So this kid around six years old asked, "Can I have that?" (Pointing to the Mine Stryker Battleship KRE-O set in my hand.)  I replied "No."  Then he asked "Why?  Do you have a son?" I replied "No, not yet."  First of all, that was quite bold of him to ask an adult that, as his ignoramus of a mom just giggles like he's being cute and it is also none of his business if I have a son.  Maybe I have a daughter who likes to play with bricks!  I am sure if Austin and I had a little girl, she would like playing with building bricks and Legos.  Please.   How obnoxious of this child.  My brother's mom just chimed in and said that maybe this kid was in awe that a grown adult woman was buying all of these toys.  Whatever.  Times are changing, grown ups are hooked on toys too!  

I have made of earrings here and there.....

Onyx with brown Agate with Metal findings.......

Autobot earrings with Sterling Silver

Rose Quartz pendant.....

Rhondite with Sterling Silver findings....

Black onyx earrings.......

In major Transformer news, we found the masterpiece Soundwave and this means Austin got his early birthday gift early!

This has been an exciting week!!!!!